Why did the coffee taste like dirt?
Youve already gotten a short about me, now youre gonna get a slightly longer one (hopefully?). My name is Crickothy "Animalcrackerman" Cricket (LEGAL NAME TRUST!!!!), I was born on October 5th, I have the shortest memory known to man. Maybe a bit more than stupid, probably unemployed for the rest of my life, but Im a bit cool in someones eyes so that makes up for it. Very anti-censorship, and as you could have probably told already from the million times Ive mentioned it, very in love with Azumanga Daioh. I have a best friend, Marlboro, and a wife, Valerie. Lactose intolerant, but I refuse to acknowledge it. The closest to a human a human can get, yet the farthest from humanity you can think of, more of a faggot than any of these. I believe Im pretty set on life, Im just waiting until something kills me, whether that be myself or something else. Selectively bred to gain every single mental illness in my entire family tree yet still not know how to do basic math.
LIKES!
I dont really think I like many things, besides the basics like my friends, my family, fresh air, all of that. I have a big love for the Portal games, been in love with them ever since I was little and my uncle bought the first game for me. My favorite drinks are Strawberry Fanta (really almost any fanta in general), lemonade, and sweet iced tea. My favorite food is spaghetti, my favorite color is either dark violet or scarlet, my favorite animals are kittens, hamsters, deer, and seals, lots of favorites over here. I really like listening to TV Girl, The Smiths, Queen, and Goreshit, all popular bands/artists, I know, but I swear its not like that. I love my two kitties, Z and Monster, which I may show in the future, Im not sure. So much for "not liking many things".
DISLIKES!
This list is gonna be even shorter, since while I dont like I like very many things, I dislike even less. I guess Ill just say them in no particular order to get it over with. Slimey textures, mashed potatoes, anything to do with the word slit, absolutely ANYTHING to do with needles, anything to do with eyes, the double jointed kids that used to purposefully bend their limbs in front of me because it made me nauseous, anyone thats happier than me.
Now that you know enough about me, why dont you go back home?
Because it was ground just a few minutes ago.